I cannot begin to tell you how many times a week, I utter the words, “I hate my life right now!” I don’t really hate my life, I hate what’s happening at a particular moment in time.  I seriously need to get another catch phrase. I work with kids who have the absolute right to say, “I hate my fucking life.” I do not have that right.  I LOVE my life.  I just have poor coping skills sometimes.

For instance…there’s a blizzard a coming our way. My mind immediately went to: power outages, potential car accidents, and all sorts of unhappy thoughts. And for a nano-second, I caught a glimpse of the wonder spread across my kids’ faces as my daughter realizes that the snow will most likely engulf her entire body, and as my son’s imagination runs a muck as he envisions snow battles with my husband,complete with forts, tunnels, and copious amounts of flying snowballs! But then the dread crept back in, forcing all of the happy images out.  WHY?!?!?!? I understand that as an adult, I have certain responsibilities and with those responsibilities come certain worries/concerns.  How do other people keep those concerns at bay and enjoy life?

The other night, my husband hugged me and said, “I’m sorry there’s so much going on in your life right now.” I had to think about that for a minute.  Work is stressful at times.  It will always be. It’s work! My family has some stuff happening, but all families have their issues, and we’ll get through ours with some yelling, some crying, and a shitload of love and support.  I have PCOS, I will always have it. I need to control it better so it stops controlling me.  My kids are kids.  I need to let them be and worry about cleaning, laundry, and other crap when they’re asleep! I need to enjoy my children’s childhoods.  I’m not minimizing the stressors in my life, however, they could be so much worse!

Life is hard sometimes.  Some days it literally sucks huge balls. But isn’t that part of life? In case you’re pondering that question, STOP!!!! The answer is, OF COURSE!!

But not these big!   : )

    Unfortunately, I have allowed stress to interfere with my weight loss.  I haven’t gained anything, (except period weight, which always leaves when that angry bitch vacates my uterus!) but I haven’t lost any lb’s lately either.  Time to re-focus! And here’s just a reminder to all of you who are supposed to be yelling at me when you see me stuffing my face hole with unhealthy goodies; your silence is helping no one!!

Stay warm, and enjoy the blizzard!